Patriarchy and its multifaceted nature remain the most ancient practices in contemporary era. Women and daughters being the most tormented.
My community is a perfect ground where patriarchy excels. I live in a very traditional society. Though, the elites disliked when referred to as traditional. In this context, the term traditional is strongly based on principal affiliations and historic beliefs the society has towards women.
Firstly, the boys and men in my community are said to be literate and socially ‘responsible’; relatively to the women. In essence, a socially responsible man is assumed to be financially affordable, career driven or job satisfied. In addition, he is elegant, may be married (single), and may have some local fame. The above personalities doesn’t necessary reflect his sensitivity to how he relates with women. For instance, it is very common to hear that the so called socially responsible men abused (killed) their wives/girlfriends. Most notable among these categories of men are University tutors, medical doctors, military, celebrities, clergies, business tycoons etc. Other categories of these persons include the heirs of wealthy enterprises, and most often are not necessary fonctionnaires. It is unbelievable that regardless of these characters, the perpetrators remain very influential in the community.
My disappointment is as a result to the fact that woman must live by the established norms; irrespective to whether it’s against her desires. Apparently, a good woman is she who is continually in charge of the family wellbeing and is likely to concentrate more on the domestic works. These include; laundry, cooking, mopping etc. Besides, the good woman must no stayed late nights, the good woman should always rush home after work for the kids (or husband), and she cannot go drinking with male colleagues without her husband. In order words, the good woman qualities should always prevail in all that the woman does.
In situations where the woman performs otherwise, the good woman qualities disappear and eventually she becomes a bad woman and a bad influence in the society. The bad woman is seen as the rule breaker, the disobedient, immoral etc.
My biggest worry above all is the fact that young people nowadays have integrated the notion of good and bad woman. I detest seeing my peers succumbing to this assumption. Each day, I struggle to avoid these archaic mentalities away from my side. Before I know it, I am accommodating some of the acts.
I have reflected on ways to speak out and could only find solace by vomiting my venom here. I do wish by expressing myself virtually will enable me realize this dream, where young people would stand up against the good woman, bad woman propaganda.