A MOTHER AT EIGHTEEN

Like many young girls, Sharon was taught to be a good girl. Once more, this is a powerful story.

Sharon's parents would advise her to avoid boys because they were destructive. She was made to understand that her education was her only priority in life. Definitely true to an extent.  Little Sharon was able to worked very hard and would always devote most of her time for studies.

Later on in the years, Sharon started having some acquaintances, girl colleagues especially. She was happy and joyful whenever she was with her peers. Her interaction with girlfriends grew bigger and bigger to a point where they started referring to themselves as “the flow of sexy”, the sexiest girls on campus. It was fun, Sharon testified she loved it.  For she felt liberated and satisfied.

After a number of years, by 2007, Sharon felt like experiencing something beyond acquaintances. Her desire for this new life beginning started the moment she met this intelligent, sexy and humble young boy called Gerrand. Sharon knew that Gerrand was the perfect match for her though she was hesitant. Not until, 28th February2009 when she finally decided to follow her heart (mind).

Sharon says;

    “My relationship with Gerrand was respectful. I was happy. All was fine. Until that day when everything happened so fast, so exciting. Little did I know– weeks later I will be confirmed pregnant. It hadn’t occurred to me that people get pregnant that easily. I didn’t know what to do and how I was going to present my situation to my father. I was also scared to tell Gerrand. I felt he might refuse taking responsibility. At that moment, lots of thoughts keep flagging through my mind especially the phrase ‘…boys are destructive’. I wondered in thought what my parents had meant by that.

    While in my confused state of mind and feared to be rejected by family, friends and the community. On the other hand, my mum wouldn’t stop crying. It was hurting to see my mum cried that long. I tried to compose myself but could not. The experience was sad. The day was bitter. I tried to imagine how my dad will take the news. I couldn’t wait to face my dad. At the same time, I was unready to see him.

    The day was getting dark. The clock was ticking faster.  It was almost time for my dad to get home. Finally, my dad arrived home and my mum was still sobbing. So he asked with great curiosity what was going on and why mom was crying. I agitated for a while, thinking my mum would speak first. But she spoke nothing. No word from my mum, all she did was to re-adjust herself on her seat and eventually continued her sobbing. Her attitude was really disturbing and upsetting.  Once more, my Dad re-asked what was going on in his house - knowing who my dad is; I knew it was safer for me to respond, for he hates to be ignored. So in a low humble tone I said “I am pregnant dad…and that is the reason Mum is crying. “Am sorry”… i could see this stern look on my dad's face listening while I stammered with words. Even after I had spoken, he was remained stilled, wearing this fake smiling expression. Without offering a word he pulled me closer to him. I thought he wanted to cheer me up. Behold, he took me to his whipping spot and got me well-whipped. I was whipped without pity. I thought I was going to die having received all the countless whips.

    The following day, I was summoned by the clan elders for an urgent meeting. At the meeting I was told to apologies for being a disappointment to the entire clan. Being the first girl in the family, it was a disgrace so they say. In addition, I was told, I should know that I am responsible for any medical or whatever pregnancy attention needed. And hence, I should take responsible for my life or preferably I abort the child.  Listening to all their sermons, I knew it was impossible for me to abort, besides, abortion is illegal and secondly where do they expect me to generate income to sustain myself.

    After the meeting, I sneaked and immediately rushed to see Gerrand and to tell me everything. After my conversation with him, surprisingly, Gerrand demonstrated some great joy and happiness and also promised to take full responsibility. Gerrand’s reaction was shocking. For I least expected him to show such a great concern. Nonetheless, it gave me strong strength and hope for well.

    Finally, I kept the pregnancy and gave birth to a girl. I named her Mercy because God have had mercy on me. Even though, my dad was still not happy with me and Gerrand.  In spite of all the grief, I am thankful that I was able to move on with my life for the sake of my baby girl. And if there is one thing I have learned is the fact that closed relationship between parent-to-children is very important in every family.  A child should feel free to interact with his/her parents at all level and shouldn’t be limited to academic but beyond her/his studies.

    Mercy is now two and a half. She looks like her grandmother”

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